staying away from your second hometown
and there’s too much weight, at least for now. academic acquaintances i’m concerned i will be judged by–it doesn’t matter that i know deep down they would never. because they’re good people, they are. and then. i could go and half-hope you’d be there, always on edge from the self-inflicted embarrassment, surrounded by faces i barely recognize. really, i’d rather not. i’d rather stay home and catch up on the sidelines, do my chores, have dinner on time, a quiet fade into night. waiting instead of chasing–there is nothing wrong with that.